It took some time to drift off. It usually does around a Waning to Full moon period. I often feel as if I’ve been plugged directly into it’s intensity – I need less sleep and I become a tad more sensitive, some may say a little touchy and short!
During my 20’s and early 30’s I truly believed I was losing the plot at times. Why couldn’t I sleep as well as I could the rest of the month? Why did I become more sensitive and moody? I would resist all of my feelings for many years, which only added to the confusion, fustration and fatigue.
Around 8 years ago I decided to log my feelings into a “Mental Mood Diary”. Quite quickly a pattern emerged. It became clear that the energy shift in me happened in conjunction with the phases of the moon. Learning this allowed me to understand the sudden changes and prepare for the shift with less resistance, more acceptance and an urge to channel this time into something more creative and useful.
Through yoga and meditation one can learn to become a witness of their own awareness. It’s as if you are able to stand on the periphery of your own life, watching the movie as it continues to roll on without you. Sometimes I have to laugh at my constant mental chatter – my monkey mind.
Last night I lay awake. It was a Waning moon! Instead of allowing myself to get all wrapped up in the why’s, when’s and what’s I instead checked into a little pranayama (breathing exercise).
With one hand on my heart and the other on my tummy I spent several minutes breathing into my left hand (heart/lungs) – Then several minutes breathing into my right hand (abdomen) – finishing up synchronizing the breath – inhaling tummy to heart, exhaling heart to tummy for around several minutes.
This is something I play with when I can’t quite drift off, when the light of the moon is so intense it feels like daylight. Through this practice and the quietness of night, I adventure into layers of my life that have become a little buried. The layers that quite often get stored to the bottom of the pile, or live in the shadows of all the other more recent stories. The Wonderful Present.
Last night was quite a trip. A trip into me and my life – that had it not been for the craziness of the moon, the sudden extra burst of energy, the chance wouldn’t have presented itself. Instead, I would have been all snuggled up fast asleep. Its easy to forget about our own journey with all the busyness of the present – Being mum, wife (well girlfriend of 15 years so as good as!), yoga teacher, cook, cleaner, mortgage payer, dog owner etc… This all takes up most of my days.
Recalling my full life story gets considerably harder each time I attempt it. However, it is during this quiet period I lay awake with the brightness of a waning moon and the stillness whilst everyone else sleeps peacefully, that I tend to enjoy this powerful trip down memory lane. Time to reflect on some of my own awesome stories.
I often have chats with friends/students about their regular struggles with sleep, moods and general energy levels. I really recommend that you begin to make notes. I’m sure you will also begin to see a pattern emerge. Utilize this time to lay with one hand on your heart, the other on your belly becoming aware of your breath. Begin to watch your thoughts as they come and go, not attaching to any of them to begin with. Once you feel calm and settled into the breath choose to stay there, or maybe begin to tap into your own life story. Maybe asking yourself what it is you’d like to add to your story? Listen to what lays deep within you, connecting with your true sense of self, your deep embedded wisdom.
You may find that one day you actually start looking forward to the moon keeping you awake at night!
Thanks for reading. Kx